Feliks Zemdegs Misses the Cut for Final Round at World Championship
(THAILAND) - In a stunning upset, cubing favorite Feliks Zemdegs failed make the cut for the final round of the 3x3 speedsolve event. As he rounded out an average of 13.62s, mouths were agape as the hushed crowd of onlookers tried to process the incomprehensible scene that unfolded before them. With a disgusted look, Zemdegs merely shrugged as he walked off the stage, not meeting the multitude of blank stares that greeted him on the way back to his seat.
"I'm afraid this might be my fault," claimed David Zemdegs, father of the former prodigy. "I thought it would be lucrative to have Seven Towns sponsor Feliks for this event. Feliks wasn't happy about it, but from my research in the forums, the consensus is that 'it's the cuber, not the cube.' It made sense at the time, but now I am really beginning to wonder..."
2009 World Champion Breandan Vallance had mixed feelings. "Of course it's nice to have Feliks out of the way, but I fear now that it will be a hollow victory for me."
Feliks himself was disgusted with the results. "Look, I can get by without corner-cutting, but this cube feels like it's been lubed with cement. I mean, you've got to be f'ing kidding me. I nearly broke a finger!"
Slow motion replays will be available on YouTube tomorrow for the viewing public's amusement.